THE BEST TRAIN CONVERSATION I HAVE EVER OVERHEARD
Man 1: But I'm not Gay!
Man 2: Yeah, but if you WERE. Thor or Loki?
Man 1: but I'm not!
Man 2: IRRELEVANT! THOR OR LOKI!
Man 1: honestly?
Man 2: THOR OR LOKI!
Man 1: probably Iron Man.
Man 2: SERIOUSLY? TONY STARK?
Man 1: yeah. I'd love to be Robet Downey Jr's bitch. God, that man....
Man 2: ooh I know what you mean. how would he proceed?
Man 1: well we'd be having dinner and he'd have his hand on my leg and he'd whisper in my ear and tell me exactly what he was going to do to me.
Man 2: oh yeah..
Man 1: and then his hand'd go further to the top of my leg and start grasping my-
Random Woman: EXCUSE ME THERE ARE CHILDREN ON THIS TRAIN.
Man 2: ...and you said you werent gay!
snowpetrel: i was babysitting a little boy and girl once and the boy asked me if i had a boyfriend and i said “no!! but i have a girlfriend!” and he said “like a friend thats a girl?” and i said “no like a boyfriend but they’re a girl instead of a boy! we still do couple things but we’re just both girls” and he said, without missing a beat, “oh ok! are you gonna marry her?” like it’s literally...
suckmydickboy: doctorbenderslendyspy: theirrepressiblebecky: dance-dream-dare: constellation-of-kasterburous: rosiebeck: This is the best video in existence. Your argument is invalid. I LOVE YOU JOHN BARROWMAN! Oh my xD ♥ why is he so perfect Oh my god! XD
bekahgale: nnonnahss: k-n-a-s-t-y: tsarcasm: according to USA Today, the average tumblr user spends 2.5 hours a month on tumblr oops more like 2.5 hours a day more like 2.5 hours an hour 2.5 hours an hour
person: but that ship doesn't make sense because that character already likes someone else..
me: shhh do you hear that?
me: it's the winds of me not giving a fuck
As an atheist, I see nothing “wrong” in believing in a God. I don’t think there...– Ricky Gervais: “Why I’m an Atheist” (via likejameslovedlily) Bam! (via viciousblueyes)
dumbpointyanimeshades: shoutout to anyone that actually likes roses character and dosent just use her as a shipping toy
me and the 6 yr old I'm babysitting: *watching a study in pink*
6 yr old: are they best friends?
6 yr old: they don't look like best friends.
me: really? what do they look like?
6 yr old: boyfriends.
6 yr old: yes. they're in love. that old lady thinks so.
me: *internally screaming*
batman: i just met you
batman: and this crazy
batman: im bruceman, i mean batwayne.
batman: fuck can I start over?
When there is a ship on your dash that you don't...
cauldronjinx: I bet that Moriarty’s code to call of the killers was “sniper no sniping!”